My brain just died, all painfully.

[tiggymalvern]

Why? Why do people do this? It makes ebay a very scary place *whimper*

Comments

[notowned.livejournal.com]

damn, that put's paid to the idea of me getting any more sleep this morning. That's just plain horrble.

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

Sometimes it can be so comforting just to have someone agree with me on this. Because I come across this kind of thing often enough during my innocent daily trawl for man-porn that I really start to wonder, you know?

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

I almost think this is worse - or maybe I've just grown sadly immune to seeing huge-eyed girly Vash in a French maid's oufit with continued exposure :-(

It's the tits, and the coat cinched in to give him a small waist and girly hips and... damn, now I feel all ill again.

[notowned.livejournal.com]

it's Vash!Sue!

[jaina.livejournal.com]

Quick, alert Millyfan!

[techno4tomcats.livejournal.com]

Uh. One of the cool things about Vash was the fact he was a guy. Now this drawing robs me of that.

;_;

Ow.

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

Well, given my take on him, probably much the same as he'd do with the original version, once he got over the surprise ;-)

[king-chiron.livejournal.com]

Maybe it's really his sister we haven't heard about before?

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

Yeah, because MarySue!Vash would be so much better!

The thing that really curdles my brain is that artists will put a picture like that on the front of a doujinshi and sometimes people will still buy them. I almost feel like I should put a watch on this, just to see if there's anyone out there who actively wants it....

[arafel.livejournal.com]

O_O

Actually, this isn't the first Vash-as-girl dj I've seen, but that pic is painful.

[jaina.livejournal.com]

They reduced Vash's sexiness! That is both difficult and HORRIBLE!

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

Horrible, yes. Difficult - damn, but I wish. You're probably safer over on the het side of things, don't have to wade through the oceans of helpless, fainting self-insert uke!Vash. I guess the one thing to be said for this is at least the doujinshika's being honest about what she's doing. Nobody could buy it accidentally....

[jaina.livejournal.com]

True, but I do have to deal with "I'm being fucked with a dry prickly cactus" Meryl. I think we're about even. ;)

[mistressrenet.livejournal.com]

Okay, now I'm traumatized.

[jaina.livejournal.com]

I meant that figuratively.

[arafel.livejournal.com]

What are you talking about? *scared*

[jaina.livejournal.com]

I meant her expression. Women should not look like they're being slowly tortured while having sex.

[glass-bullet.livejournal.com]

Whoa. That's just outright fuckin scary.

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

I feel I need to be protected from this type of thing. I mean, I should be able to search ebay for my hot gay porn supply without risking being exposed to harmful material like this, right?

[yma2.livejournal.com]

My response was a mental...
AUUGHHHHHHH!
:runs away:

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

The really scary thing is some people obviously do find it erotic, or at least funny. Enough to make it worth producing this kind of doujinshi.

[yma2.livejournal.com]

I must admit, I *do* find kinda it funny, but erotic? I mean, if they'd entirely feminised him, maybe, but Puh-leeze! That's just... well... wrong.

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

I'd probably have more chance of finding it funny if de-masculinising Vash wasn't such a common thing, you know? The yaoi fandom in both Japanese and English is filled with a big-eyed, weepy, pathetic guy whose sole reason for existing is to be screwed hard by Wolfwood. Stick that creature in a red coat and call it Vash.

If someone wanted to genderfuck Vash and still have him be crazily in-your-face dangerous, still have him snark hard at Wolfwood and basically do whatever the hell he felt like, I'd say go for it and have fun. But nobody ever does.

Sad icon :-(

[yma2.livejournal.com]

Nobody ever does, eh?... mm... you've gone and tempted me now... heheheh...
Glad you like the Icon. I've made quite a few from your Manga scans... wish I'd somewhere to put them all... ):

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

Well, if you do it, it'll save me from adding it to the list of plot bunnies now that it's out there! I'd like to see more of your icons if they're not up on your list.

[bandita.livejournal.com]

My goodness...you know, when I finally saw with my own eyes the abomination that is mpreg-Vash, I thought I had seen it all.

Just goes to show how naive I really am. :O

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

Whatever awful things you have seen, someone will always commit something worse. This pic pretty much just reinforces what I already believed *sigh*.

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

Not only does it exist, but in quantities to curdle the brain....

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

male plants can get pregnant?

On the nail. Because he's not human, he can be anything you like - in theory. Including pregnant, according to some.

Mpregs - hmm, I don't normally keep the links to badfic, just the good ones! There's one here that involves a Mary Sue on the top of the mpreg and hideous Vash and Wolfwood bastardisation just for extra laughs.
http://www.mediaminer.org/fanfic/view_st.php/41622

There are many more equally awful if you care to explore ffnet and mediaminer more fully. There was a particularly excruciating one on the trigun_yaoi mailing list last year that had Vash discovering Wolfwood wasn't dead after all as he gave birth. Have fun!

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

I adore plush Cthulhu! Almost as much as I adore plush Strep XD

There are so many things to love about Life's Marionette; the trailer trash!Wolfwood is a major bonus. And the Mary Sue that nobody bothers to kick out of the house for no obvious reason - you wondering why the author picked 'comedy' as one of the labels yet? But comedy was funny the last I heard....

[andmydog.livejournal.com]

Ah! Shit! There's a horrible estrogen sandworm leech thing in Vash's clothes! It's wrapped around his waist and moving toward his head! It's gonna kill him!

Arrgh.

Why do doujinkas keep taking Vash's penis? He needs his dick! It's, like, attached!

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

Says the one who removed his dick and gave him feathers instead XD

[andmydog.livejournal.com]

Wasn't me! Was some pervy doujinka, and, um. I'll be over here.
(/Totally innocent)

[darthhellokitty.livejournal.com]

It's his twin sister, Sporks!

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

I'm sure the doujinshi gives some dazzlingly innovative explanation for it - but I'm not going to pay to find out!

[mistressrenet.livejournal.com]

They could've at least made him a hot chick.

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

I'm still not entirely sure that would be enough to save the doujinshi, though....

[mistressrenet.livejournal.com]

No, but it would be...I don't know. Marginally less pain-inducing.

Marginally.

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

You know what's worse? The crazy brigade of squigette and opalweb bid it up to just under $100. Not only did someone want that thing, but two people wanted it that badly.

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

There were 24 mins left when I posted that - it went for $120 in the end.

Over $100 is common when those two names come up. I've seen them spend over $300 on a single book. Just on the 6 books I was watching, squigette has spent over $400 today. Me, I'd fly to Japan and buy the things myself if I had that kind of money to spend on them, you know?

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

Certainly from the ebay seller's POV! But of course now he'll only be encouraged to seek out more of this crap for me to fall over, all unsuspecting.... *scared*